Letters from Lilongwe

My name is Pride. I am a cheater. I cheat you of your God-given destiny… because you demand your own way. I cheat you of contentment… because you “deserve better than this.” I cheat you of knowledge… because you already know it all. I cheat you of healing… because you are too full of you to forgive. I cheat you of holiness… because you refuse to admit when you are wrong. I cheat you of vision… because you’d rather look in the mirror than out a window. I cheat you of genuine friendship… because nobody’s going to know the real you. I cheat you of love… because real romance demands sacrifice. I cheat you of greatness in heaven… because you refuse to wash another’s feet on earth. I cheat you of God’s glory… because I convinced you to seek your own. My name is Pride. I am a cheater. You like me because you think I’m always looking out for you. Untrue. I’m looking to make a fool of you. God has so much for you, I admit, but don’t worry…

You can tell what you really care about when it keeps you awake at night.  Tonight(10/8/2013 11:55pm) I have been unable to sleep due to the current state of sexuality on my campus and the college culture towards sexuality in general.  Therefore I am going to write until I get tired and can close my eyes without the rush of these thoughts.  Two summers ago while at SDP an identity was spoken over me that often haunts me...  I am called a Pillar of Purity, often times in my life I have not walked in this identity!  I have taken my sexuality and traded it for instant satisfaction, throughout high school I dove head first seeking all of the gratification I could.  I ran from the Lord mainly in this area of my life...  I would wake up on Sunday and head to church and feel intense guilt and shame for my sin but would not change my ways.  Feeling the guilt of sin often drives me further from the Lord and deeper into that sin!   Therefore it was such an amazing feeling to arrive at Tech and